So I'm going to go fold the wash. Not my wash, mind you. No. That would make sense. Instead, I'm going to go fold my mom's wash. Because since she's been sick I've been washing my parents clothes every week. For almost 8 months now. I do it because it's the right thing. I do it because someone has to do it. And I don't complain because I don't want to look like a bad or unsupportive or unloving daughter. But let me be completely honest:
I hate it.
I hate it because I find other people's dirty clothing to be really gross. I hate it because I already have 5 people to wash for in my own family. I hate it because washing clothes is not my idea of a good time. But mostly what I really hate about it is what it represents.
Because what it means to me is that I'm The Mom now. My mom isn't The Mom of the family anymore. She's still a mom, but she's not The Mom. I am. And I just don't feel grown up enough to be The Mom. Oh, I know I'm almost 40 years old and I have 3 kids and actually am a mom and have been for more than 7 years, but being The Mom is a different proposition. Being The Mom means being the caretaker of the family: planning the family holiday meals and preparing them, remembering everyone's important days, meeting the emotional needs of the family, and just generally being the last woman standing at all times.
It scares me. Truly. The role change seems to have happened so fast, although truth be told, I can see now that it's been coming for awhile. And the reality is that most moms reach this milestone at some point in their life's journey. The mantle is passed. And we do it. We do it because somebody has to.
We do it because we are The Mom.
“Honor your father and your mother, so that you may live long in the land the LORD your God is giving you." --Exodus 20:12 (NIV, 1984)
